Mike, I've been thinking a lot about those questions your junior colleague has been posing. I have to say -- and perhaps this says a lot about me and my fixations -- that "what would happen if boys had girls butts" strikes me as both compelling and poetic. He's leaped right over the more mundane and obvious standup-comedian query "What if guys had breasts?" and hit a more subtle and, dare I say, fundamental issue of gender. The butt: we sit on it, we worry about its size, and we almost never see it without a great deal of troublesome rubbernecking. A universal, no? And yet the question flies like a flaming arrow into the oily-rag-filled-basement of our unchallenged assumptions: yes! The world would be different, in some unchartable way, if we could experience that mythical Day the Butts Were Changed.