It's the Star Spangled Banner, and the two Jims (Hendrix and Neighbors) performed it - sadly, separately.

PS - They were both *very* young when they recorded it. Yeah, that's right.

God knows I wish I lived in the alternate universe where the preteen Hendrix was a 1950s icon.

A brilliant opener.

In my usual spirit of probably helping someone else get the actual answer, I'll take the obvious whack at it:

Tutti Frutti, by Little Richard and Pat Boone.

And don't you be saying shit about L'il Bow Wow.

I believe that's just Bow Wow these days, MR. Wee Hackly Fracture.

I don't suppose it's "Freakish Fish Terrorizes Maryland."

He'll always be L'il to me. And Bob Dylan will always be "Little Bobbie Z and his Fabulous Wheeze."

PS, Teenidol, reckon that song's pretty much gonna write itself. Isn't the end of the world funny?

Mr. Fracture, you are not that far off -- you have one of the performers right.

Tell mEEEEE over and over and over
Tell mEEEEE over and over and over
Is a freakish fish terrorizing Maryland?

---

Ya know, as a Marylander, I can't claim to have been much terrorized by the fish. Working as I do a diagonal block from the Flying W Ranch house, formerly known as the White House, there's plenty I'm afeared of ahead of freakish fish. Like getting run off the road by Dick Cheney's motorcade, as nearly happened a few days ago. However, our office manager is pretty freaked out -- I was just telling her that I was unaware of these freakish fish actually biting people.

Scott, they don't bite because THEY'RE GOING TO STOMP YOU TO DEATH!

And I'm pretty sure Cheney summoned them.

Anyway, Hackly "Semi-Smart" Fracture whacks away again: Blueberry Hill, by Fats Domino and L'il Bow . . . I mean, Pat Boone.

I mean, it's just gotta be Pat Boone, right? Where are the actual smart people?

With no offense meant to Scott, Bootsy, BT, or teenidol. I meant, you know, real guessers. See what I mean about semi-smart?

I'm drawing a big old blank on 50s million-selling rock and roll hits, is all. I admire your guesses, though! You're new guess feels right to me, I've gotta say.

I can only assume that Richie Cunningham was singing the Pat Boone version.

Oh wait, breaking news --

SEC Investigates Freakish Fish For Accounting Irregularities

In related news, Harvey Pitt was apparently brought to this country by a Hong Kong man who was planning to eat him, but them released him into the SEC because he was way too ugly to cook.

Oh hell, Dick Cheney! Everyone take cover!

Gosh, Bill, it really is like your old radio show today, what with the absence of the hawaiians and all your other scintillating readers.

Okay, but you want answers: Of course it's "The Happy Organ" by Dick "Shorty" Pecker and "Tiny(-Tiny) 'Lil" Peeny Johnson. (I confess: I cheated.)

Bootsy! Your answer feels right, too!

Hackly -- circling like a drunken panther, you close a wavery noose of death around the answer's neck. Were you to fail to get this, I would be forced to remark, "Isn't that regrettable?"

You know, I did almost call that radio show "An Absence of Scintillating Hawaiians," but people kept confusing it with a John Ashberry fan call-in show of the same name.

Oh, alright, I'll presume to take The Wombateer's comment as a final hint and keep the same two guys, switching the song to "Ain't That a Shame."

The words "presume to" belong absolutely nowhere in that sentence. Don't know what I lately forward was thinking.

Scott and Bootsy, you crack me up.

Still here?

"Ain't that a Shame?"

mangled by Pat Boone originally as "Is That Not a Shame?" I believe...

Oh, and the performers were Fats and Pats, natch.

Now I see the question was NOT still here to be answered.

Dang.

Indeed, the question had been duly Hack'd by Mr. Fracture -- sorry, BoxJam. I probably shouldn't have given such a broad hint, but after having seen him name Boone & Domino already, I cracked under the pressure.

I am nearly the last person still actually in the office this afternoon (we have "summer hours" on Fridays now). I feel like the world's biggest loser.

Yesterday was a big day for me, folks. I don't really know who else to tell, so. . .

Yesterday, for the first time, I got more offers of a share of Nigerian millions than I got Klez viruses.

Thanks for listening.

Hey, BT, that was an *extremely subtle* hint that I figured out because I'm *really bright.* All I needed was three guesses and a four hour headstart (and one incredibly obscure hint) to beat Boxjam! I Win I Win IWINIWINIWINIWIN hooray for me.

Summer hours . . . I'm coming over there to kick your ass right now. Where do you work again?

Sorry, Mr. Smarty-Fracture, but you can hike down to 72 9th Ave if you like but you won't find my overworked butt here to kick around. Summer or winter (well, I haven't been here long enough to know about that yet, but anyway), I'm here every Monday for twelve hours and every Tuesday for nearly as many. It's 4:35, and though every other slackety-slack employee of this company scrammed at official Friday-summer-scramming time at 1, I have been pounding the keyboard since 8:30 and therefore I say to you, SIR, that I have had enough, and even though I leave behind me a mountain of labor unwisely put off until the Hell that will be Monday, I am, in the phrase immortalized by Clueless, outtie.

Gee, go away for one day and come back to find yourself a dishonorary Hawaiian.

I guess I'll take that. Could be much worse.

Me, I'm just enjoying basking in the glory of being called 'scintillating'.

(Okay, so I was actually too busy messing about over at MeFi, and going to see 'Minority Report', and sleeping, and vacuuming.)